G&STC Director Jesse Kahn Talks with SHAPE About Sexual Chemistry
Check out G&STC’s Director Jesse Kahn talking with Gabrielle Kassel at Shape about what sexual chemistry is & how important it is to your relationship.
If you're curious whether someone you feel sexually and chemically drawn to feels the same toward you, Fleming suggests looking for hints such as sustained eye contact, shared laughter, lingering physical touch, and verbal flirts — or hey, just ask.
Yes, the best way to learn if the rush is reciprocal is to simply ask, says Jesse Kahn, L.C.S.W., C.S.T., director and sex therapist at The Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center in NYC. You might say, "I find myself feeling really sexually drawn to you. Are you experiencing something similar?" or, "I noticed that we both go out of the way to touch each other more than I do with my other friends. Have you noticed that, too? Are you interested in being more than friends? Or have I misread the situation?"
Is Sexual Chemistry Necessary for a Relationship?
The short answer is nope! "We can't make generalizations like that for all relationships," says Kahn. "There are many people for whom sex and sexual chemistry aren't important ingredients in order to have a successful, stable, and loving relationship," says Vranglova.
The better question is if sexual chemistry is a must for you in your relationship(s), says Kahn. And for the record: It's totally valid if sex and sexual chemistry are important relationship components for you.